New Stuff

     Hi all! I can't tell you how many blog post I have written in my head, then I come TO my blog only to learn that they did not make the transmission to the page. Ah, technology, letting me down once more. Then again, I probably don't want all of the things that go through my head making themselves known without my knowledge. 

     So, something new that I have been involved with lately has been book launching. Basically you participate in social media groups, talk about the book, if you are lucky there are live events, or giveaways. All of this is to promote a new book. Some authors and /or publishers send out Advanced Reader Copies for you to read and review. I love this!! So every now and then I will be reviewing some books here, mostly because I find myself sharing what I am reading anyway. I have one that I want to do right away, but I want to do it in a separate post. 

      In other news, health has been ok. Kids have been ok. The hubby is fine. Politics suck, but the Indians are in the World Series which makes my mother happy. Stay tuned! 

Disasters and such.....

     So we've had massive flooding here in Louisiana. It has been tragic, with many, many homes lost, quite a few deaths, and just a huge mess that will take a lot of time and money to clean up. On top of this, we had major flooding back in March, and some of the same areas were affected resulting in homes that were just rebuilt being flooded again. It takes a lot of strength, physical, mental and emotional to get through this, but they don't come tougher than those Cajuns. 

     We were fortunate, and are high and dry. We have donated supplies, and Ray made several trips to a nearby flooded area to help clean out the home of a couple in their 90's. I am not telling of our actions to brag, but to make a point. Every time I think I have come to terms with my vision limits, something else rears it's head. Before Ray and I were married, there were some tornadoes that flattened a city in WAY South Louisiana. We went with a group of volunteers from the fire department to help the local department. We cleared trees off houses, cleared access to streets, just a lot of hard dirty work. We loved it. In 2004, when Hurricane Ivan hit Florida, with the help of our church we loaded up the bed of our truck with cases of water, ice chests, cleaning stuff, and just drove into the middle of the aftermath. We drove into a flattened neighborhood and started serving people. Now we have had a few natural disasters around us, and I can't do that anymore. I can't be in the thick of things. I know that I can help in other ways, and I do try to be satisfied with that, but sometimes I want to stomp my feet and say it's not fair. 

     I hope to always have a servant's heart, just sometimes I'd like to have the options that I used to have. I guess we always want what don't have anymore.   

I've got a lot on my mind......

O.K We are going to start with the BLM movement, the protests, police involved shootings, and all that. It's a mess. Much like your Christmas lights when you finally get them down from the attic each year, this is all tangled together and you can't clearly tell where one issue ends and one begins sometimes. Unfortunately, we can't chunk this mess in the trash can and just go get a new set. We are stuck with unraveling what we got. And it has to be done. So screaming about it, and throwing fits won't help,

Now, Black Lives Matter. Of course they do. All lives matter. As a Christian I have the luxury of having that decision made for me. And I choose to take full advantage of that fact. Jesus died because his father decided that ALL lives mattered enough to be redeemed by Jesus. This is not a decision I have to make or question. It just is. Now that of course is speaking of people groups. As I interact with any one person, i make decisions on a case by case, sometimes, minute by minute basis. And race is often not the first thing I factor. As a female, I fear male first. Anyway.

On to the cop killing. This is just reprehensible to me. When the sniper was on the building in Dallas SHOOTING OFFICERS, officers were running into gunfire to save people, drag them from danger, cover them, And those people, there AT THAT RALLY to protest the police accepted that help, and followed those officers commands to get out safely. Credit where do, several people have come to the media to tell their stories of being helped by those they were protesting. I just don't know if those realize that's the heart of a law officer and not an isolated incident.

The other incidents. I'm stating RIGHT NOW, I was not at any of them. I can only speak from news reports, videos, personal knowledge of past incidents, and reading synopsis reports of pros. I'v ridden with officers on calls. I've listened to their voices on the radio when the "subject" is just not right. And I am a big believer in the theory espoused,( but NOT the Tactics) in the movie Grosse Pointe Blanke, about a hit man.

"If I show up at your door, chances are you did something to bring me there."- Martin Blank

Meaning that in almost every police involved shooting I've seen or heard about, SOMETHING brought them to that crossroads. What was it? prove to me how many times it was a racist cop with an agenda and nothing else that caused the interaction, and I will say, "Fire him, and arrest him, now." Until then.

In our town last week we had a BLM protest/rally whatever it's called. No one looted. no one was arrested, Black officer saw some old friends and took selfies. Politicos spoke. Black ones and white ones.  Then they went home.
A few days later we had a Police Lives Matter rally in the park. People visited a bit. Politicos spoke, everyone lit some blue candles, prayed, and went home.

The bottom line is that we have the right to gather peacefully to protest anything we want. it's guaranteed by the Constitution. Remember that little scrap of paper? It still works if we let it.

Just what's been on my mind.

You just never know.

     As we passed the last days of May and went into early June, I didn't post about it but I was really aware of the two year mark of my medical SNAFU. I think that because I'm pretty stubborn, and want to appear as normal as possible, that people don't realize how affected I am. Particularly on "bad eye days". And it's not just my vision, but the constant vertigo, which kind of ebbs and flows. Think like on the tilt-a-whirl, sometimes it's a gentle spin, and then you SPIN one way really fast, then the other. That's my life. Girlfriends have wanted to go get dinner and drinks, and I always say yes to eating, and not to drinks because I'm always feeling about 3 drinks in. I'm seriously waiting for someone to ask me if I'm ok when I go weaving down the aisle at Walgreen's or wherever. It can be embarassing. 

     Anyway, in that time, we thought we'd be planning a wedding. That is not happening. Time and clarity reveal this to be a blessing in disguise. Amanda had to leave school, which was a hard adaption, emotionally and physically. She got a good job, what she thought was her dream job, then got somewhat screwed out of it. Very hurtful time. Now she has another job, making decent money, but is not what she is interested in at all. However, her big time, big girl, job is on the horizon, and she has peace waiting for it, knowing God has her best interests at heart

     Sarah started at Aveda Institute, two weeks ago. She likes it but is already tired of the classroom portions. She's raring to go. She just hates it when anyone says "beauty school", and I agree. It is so much more than that. and the program is 1 year long!  I can say that we did have some fun when she came home with 4 heads in a bag. She has natural talent for this and will do well, I know.

     Emily turned 15 a week ago and got her cell phone. I know, I'm one of those mean moms. She was very excited and I and very excited that I have unlimited data on my phone plan.

     The point of this post is that two years ago, or even one year ago we all had different plans. Plans change. You just don't know what the path ahead of you will lead you to. I can say that with the things that have happened to our family, my girls have learned that flexibility is an invaluable character trait. And when things get rough, you don't bail out. You buckle down and do your part. And I love each of them for that.

Parenting: Get Your Head Out of Your Butt

     Last week my mother, 2 of 3 daughters, and one daughter's boyfriend, (ages 14, 17, and 18) went to the aquarium. I could not remember the last time I had been, but I know it was before Hurricane Katrina. Therefore, I know I had small children. We had a really good time, and I loved seeing all the different exhibits. They have added some things, like the parakeet area, where the birds come and sit on your hands and fingers to eat the Popsicle sticks with birdseed attached that you buy for a buck.

     Here is my issue. Many times, we saw kids being either ignored or rushed through the place because their parents were on the phone or talking to someone else. I was almost knocked down by a little boy who was running crazy, and his parents did not even acknowledge the situation because they were busy talking to the couple next to them. And the little girl next to me at the stingray petting pool did not get to pet one because her mother did not want to take the time to get her to settle down a bit and not be afraid each time they came close. It was sad. 

     Now we come to the whole incident where the boy fell into the gorilla exhibit and the gorilla was subsequently killed. I obviously was not there. And I have no doubt that the zoo staff know more about the animal than most of the public and acted appropriately. I just wonder, given what I observed this past week, if this incident was way more preventable than we know. Placing blame does not bring an endangered animal back, but if looking closely at the incident keeps it from happening again, then I say gently assign the blame where it belongs. In an intelligent way. If the zoo habitat needs to be redesigned, then do it. If there needs to be a zoo staffer assigned to monitor the balconies of the "open" areas, hire them. And if parents need to bring aunts or uncles or grandparents with them to make the ratios of adult to child even, for safety, go for it. 

     I don't mean to sound judgemental. And while I think my kids are pretty great, and that Ray and I did a pretty good job, at least so far, we did lose Sarah at the parish fair once. She got away from us and got in line for the roller coaster. She was 4. We were very lucky.

     I have been absent from my blog posting for a bit because I have a lot to say,and at the same time, so much that can't be talked about. Not because it's not worth talking about, but it is not really mine to talk about. Necessarily vague. If you are close to my family, you know.

     All that has happened lately has made me very aware of how old my kids are. Em is 14. She is the least needy of the bunch, and really wants to be left alone most of the time. You know the type. Throw some food in the cave every now and then. But the fact is, she is the youngest child. Because of the events of the last two years I have found my self in a very weird place. I know that at some point, usually the parents become more needy than the children, causing a shift in the structure of the family. By necessity, because I can't drive anymore, I have become dependent on two of my children for transportation already, and I am not liking it so much. At first I was pretty amazed, and very thankful that I was ok with being the perpetual passenger. Before, I liked to drive. All the time. When we went anywhere, I almost always drove. All about the power, I guess. And now, it's not that I want to drive, it's that I am tired of having to ask. To arrange. To figure it out. And to miss things when it doesn't "work out". And I still have to arrange for Emily. It is a cycle of never ending guilt, and I'm pretty tired of it. But It won't be ending anytime soon. Like ever.

   

Slogging Through Syrup

     I can't believe that I have neglected to post a blog since July. I can say that I have drafted many entries in my head. I have gone over many topics, discarded a LOT of stories to protect the guilty, and gotten up so many mornings with the intention to write something, anything on my poor lonely blog.

     But.... like much of my life right now, I never seemed to get to it. I often feel like I am slogging through syrup. Like every task is harder and takes longer than it should. Aside from the health issues that I am still dealing with, the medicine I have to take has some side effects. All of it combined leads to good days, and not so good days. Then the not so good days lead to tons of guilt about what didn't get done that day. I feel so much guilt, all the time, I'd swear there has to be some Jewish blood somewhere back in our history.
 
     On a good note, Amanda got her first "big girl" job, ironically as a 911 dispatcher. I am very proud. Ray and I counted and from my grandfather through to her, we have had 10 different badges in our family. I wish my dad and Pawpaw could see that. But I know they can.  Last week we went to see two wedding venues and have started planning the wedding. Herding cats comes to mind.......LOL.

     Also last week, we ordered Sarah's graduation invitations, cap, gown, etc. She has been on the A-B Honor Roll this year and is actually enjoying it. Figures that she'd find her groove in the last stretch. She had a choir concert last night that was SO GOOD. I am a huge sap, and I only got teary once. Seriously. I cry at ALL these kids performances. Any video has me in the background sniffing and snorting. Check out my YouTube channel. You'ii see.

     Emily is Em. she's 14. No other comment. Just kidding. She's a sweetheart, taller than me (duh), with curly hair like the goat on FB. She is OBSESSED with Pentatonix.

So anyway, that's whats been up with me. Got a few things on the horizon, and I totally intend to blog it!